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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/25234378">Saying Goodbye</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/Red_Lenses/pseuds/Red_Lenses'>Red_Lenses</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Steven Universe (Cartoon)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Animal Death, Crying, Gen, Grief/Mourning, Pumpkin isn't here but it's all about her</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-07-13</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-07-13</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-05 03:20:39</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Major Character Death</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>2,135</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/25234378</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/Red_Lenses/pseuds/Red_Lenses</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>An important phone call brings Steven back to Little Homeworld.<br/>Set post-canon. Written on request.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>10</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>24</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>Saying Goodbye</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p class="p1">The summer sun shone brightly through the few wispy clouds that drifted across the sky, casting its warm light upon the quiet street. The umbrellas over the cafe’s outdoor tables blocked out its glare but Steven could still feel its warmth wrapping around him as he sat, sipping his milkshake contentedly.</p>
<p class="p1">His full attention was on the girl sitting opposite him, one hand resting loosely on her own cup and the other gesturing animatedly in the air as she spoke. “… She can be so stubborn sometimes, Steven. I still can’t believe she tried to correct me about my major last week when it’s not even her own subject! I’ve had bad teachers before, but she takes it to a whole new-“</p>
<p class="p1">Connie cut herself off mid-sentence when a quiet jingle started up. She looked questioningly at Steven, who had already plunged his hand into his pocket to take out his phone. “It’s Peridot,” he stated after glancing at the screen. “Do you mind if I take this?”</p>
<p class="p1">“Sure.”</p>
<p class="p1">Steven flashed her a thankful smile before answering the call. “Hey, Dot! What’s…” His voice faltered as he registered the sound of sniffling on the other end. At once his smile vanished and he turned away from his girlfriend, now entirely focused on the phone call. “Peridot?”</p>
<p class="p1">There was a muffled sob in response before Peridot finally spoke up, her voice shaking and cracking in a way that filled his veins with ice. “S-Steven…”</p>
<p class="p1">She whimpered softly and he heard the phone change hands. A moment later Lapis’ voice reached him, low and serious. “Steven, you have to come back to Little Homeworld. We need you.”</p>
<p class="p1">“Why? What’s wrong? What happened?” he asked urgently.</p>
<p class="p1">For a few seconds all he could hear was the now-distant sound of Peridot quietly crying. When the response finally came it sent a spike of dread through his chest.</p>
<p class="p1">“It’s Pumpkin.”</p>
<hr/>
<p class="p1">He didn’t bother with his car or locating a warp pad. Minutes after his hurried explanation and farewell to Connie, Steven was clinging to Lion’s back as he sprang through the portal that would take him back to his friends. One short trip later and Lion’s paws were hitting grass again, bringing him sliding to a stop even as Steven leaped from his back.</p>
<p class="p1">They had arrived just outside Little Homeworld, not far from the edge of the woods. A glance around quickly told Steven why Lion had brought him here in particular; by the edge of the trees sat Peridot and Lapis, the latter of whom had looked up at the sound of Steven’s arrival. Her expression was bleak and she had one hand resting on her crying friend’s shoulder.</p>
<p class="p1">There was a feeling of tightness in his chest as he ran toward them. Lapis said nothing as she turned her gaze back to the tree in front of them. Steven’s footsteps slowed as he saw the mound of freshly-turned earth at its base, partly covered with bundles of flowers he recognized from Peridot’s greenhouse.</p>
<p class="p1">The uncomfortable tightness grew worse as he slowed to a stop just behind the pair. His breathing was shallow and his eyes prickling with heat as he sank slowly to his knees. Peridot barely seemed aware of him; her face was buried in her arms, her entire body trembling with the force of her emotions as she sniffled and whimpered into her knees. The grief was written all over Lapis’ face as well but she was holding herself together, so Steven directed his question to her.</p>
<p class="p1">“When did it happen?”</p>
<p class="p1">“This morning,” she responded quietly. “A few hours ago. We both stayed with her the whole time. We made sure she was comfortable. She went peacefully.”</p>
<p class="p1">Her voice shook on the last word and Peridot let out a loud sob.</p>
<p class="p1">Lapis withdrew her hand and moved to one side so that Steven could sit between the two. He shuffled forward quietly on his knees, making no attempt to brush away the hot tears beginning to creep down his cheeks. “Why didn’t you call me sooner? I could’ve saved her, I could-“</p>
<p class="p1">“Please don’t make this worse,” Lapis interrupted sharply. A moment later she sighed and her voice softened as she explained, “Last week, when we realized she wasn’t doing well, we asked Garnet. She told us you couldn’t heal her. Anything you could do would only delay it for a few days, or a week… You’d have to keep coming back here just to keep her alive for a little longer. Neither of us wanted that. It was just her time, Steven.”</p>
<p class="p1">There was nothing he could do but accept that. Instead he turned his gaze on Peridot, who had lifted her head to stare at the mound. Her tears were flowing freely, dripping onto her arms and leaving countless tiny wet spots on the knees of her outfit. She blinked hard and drew a shuddering breath. “S-Steven… she’s… she’s gone… Pumpkin is…”</p>
<p class="p1">The fragile sound of her voice broke his heart. He reached out to her and she collapsed into his arms, sobbing openly into his shoulder. “I know,” he murmured, hugging her so tightly it seemed he was trying to squeeze the sadness right out of her. “I know. I’m so sorry.”</p>
<p class="p1">He felt a pair of arms encircle both of them as Lapis joined the hug, resting her head against Steven’s other shoulder from behind. Despite the physical contact and the warm summer sun shining down upon them, Steven’s entire body felt cold from shock and grief. All he could think about was the burial mound beside them and everything it represented.</p>
<p class="p1">Gradually Peridot’s ragged breathing quieted and her shaking began to settle down. When she lifted her head to wipe her eyes Steven relaxed his grip, letting her push herself upright again to sit unsupported. “Thank you for coming back,” she told him quietly.</p>
<p class="p1">“I couldn’t leave you two to deal with this by yourselves.”</p>
<p class="p1">Lapis stood, circling around the two to sit on Peridot’s other side. She leaned closer and Peridot rested her head against the other Gem, looking exhausted from her emotional outpouring. “I miss her so much already. I know she couldn’t really understand as much as we do, but I wonder if… if she knew how much we loved her.”</p>
<p class="p1">“Of course she did,” Lapis responded gently. “And maybe she didn’t show it in the same ways, but I know she loved us just as much.”</p>
<p class="p1">Steven’s vision blurred with fresh tears and he blinked hard to clear them away. “Lapis is right. You were there for her right up to the end. The last thing she ever thought about must have been how much you loved her, and how much she loved you too.”</p>
<p class="p1">Peridot relaxed slightly, comforted by the thought. Lapis wrapped an arm around her shoulders and surveyed the mound. “Should we put something special here to mark the place? Steven, what do humans usually do?”</p>
<p class="p1">He considered it for a moment before responding, “Sometimes they plant a tree to mark the spot, but there’s already one here. Or they might put a rock here and carve something into it in memory of her. I don’t think you’ll need to do that, though. If you keep watering this spot a new pumpkin patch might sprout here. They might not be alive in the same way she was, but they’ll be like her legacy.”</p>
<p class="p1">“Alive or not, we’ll take good care of them,” Lapis promised. “Right, Peridot?”</p>
<p class="p1">“Of course,” she answered softly. “It’ll be like a part of her is still here with us.”</p>
<p class="p1">Silence fell between them, broken only by birdcalls and the sound of the breeze through the leaves. It was several minutes later before Lapis spoke up quietly again. “What else can we do in her memory? I think I’d like to make a mural for her, but there has to be more.”</p>
<p class="p1">“You can talk about her,” Steven suggested. “Just because she’s gone, that doesn’t mean you have to only think about that. Talking about good memories can take away some of the pain. It won’t make you feel better right away, but over time you’ll be able to smile instead of cry when you think about her.”</p>
<p class="p1">“Good memories…” Peridot repeated to herself. “Lapis, how about the time she rolled around in your art supplies and some of the paint tubes popped open?”</p>
<p class="p1">A weak smile tugged at the corners of Lapis’ mouth. “She was covered in it. It took so long to clean all of it off. Or when she stopped that game of baseball because the ball landed in front of her and she ran off with it?”</p>
<p class="p1">“What about when she fell asleep in the greenhouse and someone tried to water her?” Steven suggested.</p>
<p class="p1">Lapis let out a laugh that was half a sob. Immediately she covered her face with her hand, biting her trembling lip. Peridot put a comforting arm around her. “It’s all right.”</p>
<p class="p1">“Nothing about this is all right,” Lapis replied, fighting to keep her voice steady. A tear escaped past her finger and she turned her head away, curling up to cover her face with both hands. Her voice came out muffled and tremulous as she groaned, “I should’ve given her more attention. I never tried to make up for leaving her with you when I took the barn into space… I almost never brought her to my classes like you did… She must have thought I didn’t care about her as much.”</p>
<p class="p1">Peridot’s arms wrapped around her. “She’d never hold any of that against you. She understood. She was a good girl.”</p>
<p class="p1">Lapis nodded wordlessly in agreement. A moment later she felt Steven’s arms around her as well and another muffled sound of distress escaped her. Her composure was breaking down despite how hard she was fighting to keep it together.</p>
<p class="p1">“Lapis, it’s okay to cry,” Steven told her quietly. “We’re here for you.”</p>
<p class="p1">Her shoulders heaved as another sob escaped her. Slowly she found herself curling up even more, hiding her face behind her knees even as she kept it covered. The palms of her hands were as warm and wet with tears as though she had dipped them in seawater. Finally, with a great shuddering breath, she took them away and hugged her knees as she let herself break down completely.</p>
<p class="p1">Moisture welled up in Peridot’s eyes again as she held her best friend tightly. She squeezed her eyes shut but it forced itself out anyway and spilled down her still-damp cheeks. “Pumpkin was so important to me. Every time I brought her to the greenhouse she always tried to help out. Whenever I was sad she climbed into my lap. I got through so many hard times because of her. And I know she helped you in the same way.”</p>
<p class="p1">Lapis nodded again, too overcome for words.</p>
<p class="p1">“When I first brought her to life,” Steven spoke up, “all I wanted was to encourage you. I never imagined how important she’d be to all of us. She was a part of our family. I can’t imagine what our lives would be like if I’d never made her.”</p>
<p class="p1">“They’d be empty,” Peridot stated with a sniffle. “At least we have our memories of her. Nothing short of a Rejuvenator can ever take those away from us.”</p>
<p class="p1">Lapis raised her head again, wiping the back of a wrist across her eyes and taking a breath to compose herself. Her eyes fell upon the grave again before she quickly turned her head away. “I don’t think I can handle being out here right now. I’m going back to our place.”</p>
<p class="p1">“I’ll come with you.” Peridot released her and climbed to her feet, rubbing one hand across a tearstained cheek to no effect. She offered the other to pull Lapis to her feet.</p>
<p class="p1">Steven pushed himself upright as well, reluctant to leave the two Gems alone when they still clearly needed emotional support. “Do you mind if I come too? Just until you’re feeling calmer. We can share more stories about Pumpkin. I’m sure I missed a lot while I’ve been away.”</p>
<p class="p1">Peridot dried her hand and offered it to him. “Of course you can come. You know you can visit us whenever you want. And… I’d feel better if you stayed for a while. I just didn’t want to ask.”</p>
<p class="p1">He managed a small smile for her, though it fell away as he faced the grave again. One of the flowers was lying in the grass beside the mound. He bent down, lifting it from where it had fallen and delicately placing it atop the turned earth. “Goodbye, Pumpkin.”</p>
<p class="p1">Quietly he turned away. Peridot and Lapis were waiting for him; without another word he joined them to walk back toward Little Homeworld together.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Written on request for a close friend who loves Peridot and is also struggling with the loss of a beloved pet. I hope you feel better soon, Piper.</p></blockquote></div></div>
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